What A Rush!

Yesterday was crazy as I'm doing full-shift at Nike. Sales went quite high for August - people are dressing up for 'Eid and of course with the efforts given out by most of the staffs. The winner of August's sale is Ash... What do you expect? He's good at promoting stuffs! Wish I could do better so I can compete with him! Well, we're friends for sure but all of us are rival at the same time...

I think the whole rivalry thing is good as I learn to improve myself and keep on going forward.

I'm hoping I can show the same attitude in studying... Why? Because while working I can see the differences between people who're studying in higher learning institutions and those who barely finished high school. I'm not saying these kids are stupid - seriously, no offense but how they see things is way too different from the way I see things around me. Knowing things about who they are, where they from, etc. etc. really make me appreciate the chances given to me - studying in university for an example and lots of other things...

Working with these people has really re-defined the whole meaning of friendship to me...

But then, I gotta admit that since I'm working part-time, I kinda enjoy studying in classes - working makes me more organized and less post-poning stuffs and learning on how to spend my money wisely is definitely a bonus! Also no more movie every single week, or hanging out in Starbucks during weekends, or buying unnecessary stuffs!

But the thing that I regret the most is I spend less time with Sha.. With me living off-campus, things just getting worse I think.. but our crazy outings recently to Teluk Cempedak and chatting over a coffee in Old Town White Coffee just perfect as we both 'replenished' ourselves with this and that.. =D

Today I got 1 paper from 8 to 9... Went back home straight after that... around 10 Saiful came to pick me up and he drove me to the terminal... God! I really appreciate it so much as I don't have anyone to send me... Bus left at 10.30 and I reached KL around 1.30 p.m. ... Took a cab to KL Sentral and bought a SkyBus ticket to LCC Terminal... Arrived at the airport at 3 p.m and I checked in right away... I was so worried since yesterday I couldn't make it but thank God I did... and now hopefully my flight won't get delayed because it's common for AirAsia to delay their flights...

Alright, people! It's time to board already...

Happy flying everyone!

Walking Tall Part II

Sometimes I really miss the times when I was in primary school. Even though I only made few friends, it didn't really matter to me back then. How I was doing at school was the most important thing for me, or I could say my parents. I have to live up to their expectations every single day. Back then also, everyday was almost the same. School, homework, house chores, and then repeat the whole thing on the next day. I got few things to run at school - as the head librarian but it didn't cost me much work.

The thing that I remembered mostly about primary school was I kinda did things effortless. Multi-tasking was easy as I knew everything like the back of my hand.

But now, everything was so different. At this age, I find things around me very challenging even to wake up from bed and decide what I'm going to do today. Lectures that I have to attend to, assignments that I need to be done with, discussions among classmates that seems never going to end, all those sessions in labs, even after going through all these things, I'm going to be honest, I still can't see what I want to do, who I want to be, when will I ever be, in the future.

Future.

One simple word that every time I want to talk about it, I'm just speechless.

Am I going to be someone in the future? Probably that's out of the question but who knows?

I see a lot of people with different background achieved something big in different field.

If only there's a book that whenever we have problem, we just open it up and look up for the answer in there. But life's not like that. All of us need to realize how important it is to experience the life itself and live every moment.

Therefore, I'm saying this to myself,

Wake up and start decide want you want out of your life.

It's now or never!

Walking Tall

actually I'm in the middle of Systemic Anatomy class right now but since it's about female's reproduction system.... I think I can handle it... =)

Woke up this morning with one thing popped in my mind.

I'm 22. From today until 28 of July next year. Great!

I don't know why 22 is such an annoying number. Is it because it's repeating? Probably.

Other reason? I can't just think of any reason. But I'm still feeling annoyed!

Hmm.... continue to part 2 later.

signing out!

Am I Hurt?

Trying to find a right word to start this entry for about almost half an hour but I couldn't just find anything.

Here goes nothing...

I always think that maybe I was right about him. He is perfect. Perfect in every aspect I can think of. Perfect in the eyes of people around him - though some may think not but the fact that he is way too perfect for me just keep on haunting me ever since the first moment I met him.

I was in the middle of nowhere while finding one simple reason to forget someone until the day I met this one guy who I thought a worker in our faculty's photocopy centre. I was stunned when I heard his voice for the first time. After asking few questions then I found out that he's actually a student in 3rd year and what a beautiful coincidence that we shared the same department! I was so elated and thought it was a bless to have such wonderful senior and after having a quite long conversation, I left with my friend with one thing about me he misunderstood. My name or rather my nickname.

After that, he really had caught my attention. I saw him everywhere around the campus - I really did asked myself whether it was just me or it was really odd coincidences to see him even in other faculties. Such a small world isn't it? He always appears in such presentable ways of dressing up. Not too schematic but rather casual and his choice of colours just enlightened me each and every time.

From time to time, I updated myself about things that revolved around him via his classmates which happened to be housemates and people I hang out with. I know it is so high school but I don't really care about those said things.

Facebook is a phenomena and I'm one of people who included in the list of those who got really into it after signed up. There I found his account and of course I added him. Well, not to forget the fact that I was dared by someone but still, I was jumping up and down when he finally approved me. We chatted few times and I think I was having a great time spending some time 'hovering' his profile. Laughing with my friends while looking at pictures that he posted up in his FB or reading his random entries on his wall.

So basically, all I can say is I really like this guy. Up to the level I would sit in the faculty's lounge just to get a glimpse of him. Hey, he's a great guy so don't put the blame on me!

But the beautiful days have come to an end when I finally found out about his relationship with someone who attended the same university as us.

My heart was broken. Like one big shining crystal that been crushed to the wall and shattered into debris of worthless glass.

It was just a simple crush! I know and that was I thought about the whole thing but I guess it's not. My days had become so stressing with the finals were around the corner. I felt so childish and stupid.

Well, what more can I say? I moved on. Or that was I thought. Time went so fast and few months I started to hang out around him again. But the feeling wasn't the same anymore. Though some times I could feel that he actually knows about how I feel towards him but that was only a prediction.

almost 2 semesters had already passed and things don't really change much. I still catching up about him but I can see the fine and invisible line telling me I had more than enough of him already.

but I'm just a human. I make mistakes. A lot of mistakes and being easily lured into the 'black hole' of beautiful and wonderful thoughts of him probably one that I should've avoided.

Things happened for reasons. Though I tried so hard to find wisdoms behind all the things happened in my life, I just couldn't wrap my head around this thing that just happened just now.

He is getting married.

Am I hurt?

p.s this is the 'best' birthday present ever!

I Know!

The 3 months vacation is damn over! I KNOW!!!!

Just wanna wrap things up, I worked for Y2K - Factory Outlet for almost 2 months but due to something happened I went back home around mid of May...

As usual, being mum and dad's multi-purpose-assistant, I updated all their company profiles - took my almost 2 weeks!

Almost the same routine everyday... Office in the morning, cooking in the evening... Cleaning, movies with mum and Arif, etc. etc. ...

Settled with Uncle Muss' wedding, I took some time off to Sandakan to visit grandma...

Abang went home on June 1st so everything just went like hell. Got nothing to say about that.

All in all, I'm glad I went back and broke down to tears at the airport... Geez...

Arrived in Kuantan on 12th of July (went to shopping in KL before hit the bus which temporarily located in National Stadium Bukit Jalil) and felt like jumping to see my Jeremy!

Signing Out!