Thinking About Life

It's been over 6 months since I moved back to Sabah and I'm pretty much settled in.

The one thing I realised ever since I got back is I no longer have friends that I can hang out with. Friends that are single and have no other life commitment.

I really miss my best friend especially on days like this. Where I just wanna go out and have fun with my best girl.

Not gonna happen any time soon I guess. Sigh

Anyway, Happy Birthday, babe! Just know I always love you and I hope you will finally get the happiness that you seek i.e. getting married! haha

Ramadhan...

In the month of Ramadhan, there are not much I can do other than preparing the house for Eid, baking some cookies, and of course, go to the office once a while...

Few more days left before we're done with this month and I'm sure all people out there are busy too...

Just want to say remember to budget your expenses for this upcoming Eid as we all going to need spent a lot more when we hit the next semester...

Me and Mom just bought few bags of baju kurung fabrics... and I haven't decide which one to choose for Eid this year... Mom already bought Baju Melayu for my brothers (gold) and I'm pretty sure that my big bro is going to kill my lil bro for choosing the colour at some point later...

Anyway, let's hope that we all got bless from Allah...


Signing out!

Looking at the Stats...

I started this blog like end of 2008... marking the beginning of my life as a Biomedical Science student back in IIUM Kuantan campus..

Though I have this strong urge to close down this blog, I still think I want to keep it as I have a lot of memories I wrote down in this blog...

Not that I'm calling this as my diary but still...

While I was looking at the stats though the page views barely pass 1k I still grateful for those who spent some time reading this blog.. though you'll find this blog less informative and more on random stuffs... cause some of you guys already know, I post stuffs regarding the academic material in my other blog - A Journey Never Ends so this blog is more like a place for me to tell stories in my life for the past 2 years and a half...

Anyway, for those from IIUM, I think you're already know that we gonna spend 2 full months of Ramadhan and 'Eid at home, right? I think this is gonna be the most memorable vacation I ever had in my life cause for the first time since 2006, on top with Ramadhan and 'Eid, I'm gonna celebrate my birthday at home!!!

Yep! It's gonna be a one hell of a birthday party!

haha.. just kidding.. probably gonna invite close relatives and some friends to come by at my house and have a little barbecue...

It's almost prayer time, so.. I guess I see yo guys in next entry..

Take care,

Moon

In Gombak Again...

The last 5 days were AWESOME!!!

Last Friday, I woke up in the morning and started to pack my things up. I don't know why. Took a cab to LRT Putra station and went to KL Sentral and took another cab to Pekeliling. I bought a ticket to Kuantan. I was listening to mu iPod along the way only to realize when I sat at the bench nearby the ticket counter, an old lady asked me where I was heading to. During that moment, I was thinking hard. Where am I heading to?

Kuantan. I answered. Only then I realized that I was actually going to Kuantan. It doesn't make sense right? What I'm saying is, I unknowingly made myself went to Kuantan. As if it's a place that I can go to without wondering - not even a second, what to do next in order to reach that place.

Like home. Like how I can predict of what's gonna happen every time I'm on trip to home.

Though I stated that I have no reason to stay at Kuantan anymore, now I realize I still have reason to go there...

Went to the mahallah and met up all my beloved friends, replenishing my supply of crazy stories among them, saw few of my classmates in the cafe, exchanged stories and confirmed whatever they heard about me, it felt good.

Since they're in the middle of exams right now, we just ate, sleep, and talked inside the room. I went to KOS for the first time after few months and all I could see were the memories at every corner of the building.

The lecture theaters and classrooms - where I used to have my lectures, WacKOS, where I used to hang out with my friends, the sister's musolla - where I used to pray and sleep in between my lectures, and the Operation Room - where I used to fulfill my duty as the SCIENCESS Special Task's committee for two semesters in a row... and of course the long walk from KOS towards mahallah after my friends done with their revisions...

I missed being here.

Well, so much for the memories!

As I took the bus back to KL, I looked back and waved at my friends who sent me to the terminal. While on the bus, I was thinking...

Is this some kind of a closure? A sign telling me to finally move on with my life?

I think so.

But one thing that I'm pretty sure, that I still have my friends staying in Kuantan. These are the people who are giving me plenty of reasons to come to Kuantan once in a while.

Yeah. I guess so.

Good night, everybody!

Damage!

On Monday, while I was reading some books in the library, I received a call from a private number. Filled with curious, I picked up.

"Is this Nuraini Munira Jalir?"

"As the lawyer of D****** V***** R********, I would like to inform you that this company is going to sue you with RM 10 000..."

I was about to collapse upon hearing that...

"For further explanation, please call this number.."

I called the number 2 seconds after I hung up the first call.

Turns out same voice, same slang, answered my call. Then he explained about this privilege card that I agreed to sign up on October 2010 in East Coast Mall, Kuantan.

It is a privilege card that can give you discount if you flash that card while buying plane tickets from AirAsia and if you reserve at some hotels in Malaysia. The original price is RM 999 but there giving out some special promotion - RM 350 for students. I agreed to pay RM 60 for deposit, it's not I'm going to get the privilege card right away, it's a deposit that will be burned if I don't wish to proceed with the whole thing by settling the fee of RM350.

It is true that I agreed - filled a form and whatsoever, but one thing I remembered what the agent said is they don't accept any payment within 12 months, they'll send some sort of notice - letter to remind me about the whole deal.

But what the guy had told me on the phone was totally different from what I heard from before.

That if they don't accept any payment within 12 months, they have rights to sue me, with RM 10 000!

My banks accounts - Maybank, and CIMB had been suspended and I may not eligible to apply for any scholarship after this.

A letter will be sent to my current address saying that I have to be in court next week for the proceedings... WHAT???

Even the lawyer mentioned earlier that maybe it's the agent before this had some problems in explaining the whole deal to me... WHAT???

I can't think straight after that... Maybe it's my fault that I didn't read the whole agreement before signing up but how come these agents can be so stupid in explaining things?

Then the guy said if I don't want to be sued, I should pay the whole package - RM 999 plus I have to bear half of the lawyer fee of RM 350 to revoke the whole thing by 3 p.m. that day.

Is this some kind of fraud? That's what I've been thinking.

I called my parents after that and asked for their advices. My brother agreed to take care of the whole thing once he got here in KL. He called the guy earlier and had some sort of agreement to settle things which I still don't know about. But the guy agreed by settling things up by being paid with RM 300 ++. WHAT THE???

Feeling lost and unable to use my mind for awhile, my mum asked me to trust her on this that she believes that as long as I don't use other's people money, I don't cheat other people's money, there's no way I can be sued easily.

So, in conclusion, all I want to say is before you guys sign anything, do read the whole agreement!

I have so many things going on for the past 3 months already. But with this thing, I'm almost lost my senses and only today I guess, I'm back to my normal self again and be able to think straight.

I'm not saying the whole thing is settled already, but for now I think I can sleep without thinking so much about this whole crazy-stupid-ridiculous thing.

What a damage! Tsunami in Japan with 9.0 Richter's scale is devastating but this tsunami I had... a total damage to my perspective upon strangers at the shopping malls.

Just For A While

While I was surfing the internet, trying to get some ideas for my aunt's company profile cover, suddenly I remembered that it's been a while since I last post something in here...

and therefore.. not only updating it, I happened to change its layout... So, voalla!

Just want to experiment with bright colours... I kinda like the back ground... I definitely love abstracts... It's full of wild and freedom...

well, not only that... here I want to say something about... social skills...

In life, we meet new people almost every day... For me, as I already assumed myself involved in family business in civil and electrical construction, it's natural for me to meet new people every day - of course they are all older than me... therefore, it's a great experience to learn from them... Social skills are different among people and there I can see though some of them come from rural areas, their social skills are good compare to some city people who don't even know how to respect other people..

In order to gain respect from other people, we have to respect them first.. In order to be a good leader among your workers, you yourself have to show professionalism and able to take other's critics... and of course there are lots of other things you need to have in order to be a good leader...

but of course, in this line of business also, we face problems and obstacles.. but nothing frustrates us more than betrayal among our own comrades or in this case, business partner...

yesterday, a friend of my dad came to our office and talked to my dad about his friend - a long time friend, who supposed to help him in order to get a 29 mil project by lending him his licenses - and of course, will get at least 1 mil for that, had retracted his licenses and agreed to give another party his licenses for 2 mil.. though the whole process of getting the tender already done with more than 50%, and lots of money already invested just to get chance to compete for the tender, not to mention his time and efforts... and of course the preparation that needed to be carried out in order to make sure his company has no problem in handling the project - enough funding and various other things needed to be done...

But now, everything went down the drain... his time, efforts, and money had wasted already... Without doubt, that man is not trustworthy at all.. but then my dad's friend had said something that I find quite surprising..

"Yes, I lost some money, and maybe, just maybe he could win the tender and get 1 or 2 mil.. But now he's on his own.. He lost me, he lost all of us..."

Well, during that moment, I realized that this man who's sitting in front of dad is a great person... Not only admitting what goes around comes around, but also he knows everything will happen according to what had already been destined by no one else but God... So I pray to God to give him strength to cope with the whole situation and give him rezeki in near future... As long he's sincere in doing his jobs, for the sake of Allah, and for the benefits of people that he loves and cares about...

Business is full of risks... But for me, as long as you're going into the right path, Allah will always give the best and if mishaps are brought upon you, you always have to be patient and ask Him for guidance and strength...

All in all, there are lots of things I need to learn in life... Wise in choosing your friend, and always believe in your own strength are what my parents told me..

So, cheer up, people... If you think you're down, and lost... Ask Allah for guidance...

Insya Allah... You'll find your way...

Thinking of...

Again.. I've been thinking about what I'm going to do...

should I give up?

should I just throw away everything?

should I wait? For what?

should I keep on struggling? Is it really worth my time?

Is there someone gonna help me while searching for the answer?

Ugh! If only I can go back in time... But even if I go back to any point of my life and re-do things I want to do... Will everything turns for the better? Or worst?

Maybe this is just a phase...

New Discovery?

well, let's just say I have a new obsession...

Recently, I've been downloading some new anime and manga... As I don't have much time to read the manga online, I just downloaded the archived ones and put them away in between my notes and assignment. But honestly, every now and then, I'll just gonna end up watching at least one episode of the recently downloaded by myself and other housemates anime.

I've always wanted to re-watch Rurouni Kenshin, though...

But this summer, (eh!!!! Well, sometimes I assume myself living in Japan, so..) I've checked out some awesome-crazy-haunting anime such as Black Butler, Hakuouki: Shinsengumi Kitan, Kaixchou wa Maid-sama!, and another anime that I'm about to dragged into my world - Claymore.

STOP!!!!

Finals gonna ride a freaking big fireball and ready to hit me on my head!

Well, I just wanna relax a bit before killing myself during the final month of this semester...

I've been thinking a lot recently...well, up until I can't sleep well, at night...

Sometimes I wonder how my life gonna end up... What I'm gonna do about my future?

Well, the only thing that I can do right now... is pray hard that I will success in no matter what I do...

Let's Just Moved On

Trying my best to understand the meaning of life... (err... does it sounds so dramatic?)

Mid terms just ended last week.. =D

I came back from home on September, 20th with double the amount of stuffs that I brought from Kuantan.. Well, it was 'Eid.. I spent a lot basically, just can't get enough of shoes! Not forgetting my first official handbag, yay! I'm not that ladylike so I'm not into these kind of stuffs until recently when a lot of people approached me and said this and that...

So, I think.. Why not? I always avoid whenever this topic - to be more feminine and blah blah blah... Well, I always do things only when I'm ready and not rush into it as I always believe that if I do things drastically, it won't last long and I'll just going back to who I was before..

Recently I posted some stuffs in Facebook that I think it's kinda personal but it's just that I really want to say out loud but I just can't.. After having deep thought before posting those lines up, I took a deep breath and there... well, in Japanese... Though not many will understand it but as long I know I said it.. clearly there... that's more than enough...

Therefore.. I think it's the right time to let go and move on...

Let's pray hard and wish for the best to come!

Signing out!

What A Rush!

Yesterday was crazy as I'm doing full-shift at Nike. Sales went quite high for August - people are dressing up for 'Eid and of course with the efforts given out by most of the staffs. The winner of August's sale is Ash... What do you expect? He's good at promoting stuffs! Wish I could do better so I can compete with him! Well, we're friends for sure but all of us are rival at the same time...

I think the whole rivalry thing is good as I learn to improve myself and keep on going forward.

I'm hoping I can show the same attitude in studying... Why? Because while working I can see the differences between people who're studying in higher learning institutions and those who barely finished high school. I'm not saying these kids are stupid - seriously, no offense but how they see things is way too different from the way I see things around me. Knowing things about who they are, where they from, etc. etc. really make me appreciate the chances given to me - studying in university for an example and lots of other things...

Working with these people has really re-defined the whole meaning of friendship to me...

But then, I gotta admit that since I'm working part-time, I kinda enjoy studying in classes - working makes me more organized and less post-poning stuffs and learning on how to spend my money wisely is definitely a bonus! Also no more movie every single week, or hanging out in Starbucks during weekends, or buying unnecessary stuffs!

But the thing that I regret the most is I spend less time with Sha.. With me living off-campus, things just getting worse I think.. but our crazy outings recently to Teluk Cempedak and chatting over a coffee in Old Town White Coffee just perfect as we both 'replenished' ourselves with this and that.. =D

Today I got 1 paper from 8 to 9... Went back home straight after that... around 10 Saiful came to pick me up and he drove me to the terminal... God! I really appreciate it so much as I don't have anyone to send me... Bus left at 10.30 and I reached KL around 1.30 p.m. ... Took a cab to KL Sentral and bought a SkyBus ticket to LCC Terminal... Arrived at the airport at 3 p.m and I checked in right away... I was so worried since yesterday I couldn't make it but thank God I did... and now hopefully my flight won't get delayed because it's common for AirAsia to delay their flights...

Alright, people! It's time to board already...

Happy flying everyone!

Walking Tall

actually I'm in the middle of Systemic Anatomy class right now but since it's about female's reproduction system.... I think I can handle it... =)

Woke up this morning with one thing popped in my mind.

I'm 22. From today until 28 of July next year. Great!

I don't know why 22 is such an annoying number. Is it because it's repeating? Probably.

Other reason? I can't just think of any reason. But I'm still feeling annoyed!

Hmm.... continue to part 2 later.

signing out!

I Know!

The 3 months vacation is damn over! I KNOW!!!!

Just wanna wrap things up, I worked for Y2K - Factory Outlet for almost 2 months but due to something happened I went back home around mid of May...

As usual, being mum and dad's multi-purpose-assistant, I updated all their company profiles - took my almost 2 weeks!

Almost the same routine everyday... Office in the morning, cooking in the evening... Cleaning, movies with mum and Arif, etc. etc. ...

Settled with Uncle Muss' wedding, I took some time off to Sandakan to visit grandma...

Abang went home on June 1st so everything just went like hell. Got nothing to say about that.

All in all, I'm glad I went back and broke down to tears at the airport... Geez...

Arrived in Kuantan on 12th of July (went to shopping in KL before hit the bus which temporarily located in National Stadium Bukit Jalil) and felt like jumping to see my Jeremy!

Signing Out!

Few Weeks Before Final Examinations

As usual, now it's the time when presentations need to be presented, assignments to be submitted, reports to written, etc. etc. etc. ...

Today, I'm having Quality Assurance presentation. Started at 9 in the morning, we still haven't finish all the presentations... There are 12 more groups to go... Haiz.... I don't whether this is a fortunate thing for me or unfortunate thing for my group member, but we're gonna be the last group to present.... NO!!!!

It's freaking boring.... and my MacBook is already out of battery...

Thursday Night!

Feeling bored as I don't have anything to do tonight... Almost all my housemates went out for movies while I'm stuck inside my room and do nothing but staring at O-Lie - my teddy bear.

Actually, there are a lot of things I need to right now it's just that I don't think I can do anything... Well, at least for now.. I don't want to be a lazy bum throughout this weekend...

I've been through the whole one month - December '09's NST newspapers this evening with Shahida for the sake of our Parasitology assignment... Unfortunately, there wasn't much information we got... I think I need to borrow more newspapers from the library...

Aish! I wonder why I'm feeling annoyed right now... is there anything to kill? Someone? Something? =)

Ah... Tomorrow's is my best friend wedding... I wish I were there... I really want to go but there's nothing I can do about it... To be honest, I don't even ask Mum to buy me flight tickets... It's not that I don't want to go but then... I wonder what I'm going to do if I were there...

I called Mum to confirm the dates I'm going back at the end of my short semester. It's going to be exact one month holiday so I really have to plan it starting from now. I don't want to waste just like that as I know there won't be any chance for me to go back later... Next short semester will packed with practicals and I'm hoping to be graduated before I hit another short semester after that...

I miss him... again. I wonder how long it takes before this feeling fades away... Well, can it be faded away? can I just throw it away? Can I just forget?

Someone said it already...

"Moon, you got to let him go..."

But what if I don't want to let him go? Can you just let me be?

"It's not a wrong thing for you to like someone... Someone who can love someone else is guiltless.."

I wonder whether I'm guiltless or I'm just innocent regarding this thing...

I really want to see him again... Even just for 5 minutes... for the last five years since I met him... I really want to see his face again...

it's unbelievable but it's true... probably it's because I'm freaking bored right now so I started to think about nonsense.

Is it nonsense?

I Love Saturday

Today, I finished half of my Saturday in East Coast Mall shopping, eating and watching movie. It's the first time ever I went to a mall alone and I felt so light and free. I don't know whether it's a good or a bad feeling but I just felt that way. Can't help it!

Reached at ECM around 11 in the morning, I went straight to Sand - Loreal's Hair Salon and got myself a haircut. What a refreshing shampoo used on my hair! I love it! I miss my hairstylist though... Still, Shamon is a nice hairstylist. She'd done my hair very well...

Then, I went for my hotspot - Sushi King! Having okonomiyaki for a start, then some sashimi, and lastly I ordered unagi temaki. Stayed for a while in there before I had the last sip of my green tea.

Went to Living Cabin to search for Abeer's birthday present... I went through everything until I found the right one to give her... Well, hope she'll like it... :) I asked the lady at the counter to wrap it for me but I think I can wrap it better than her. Honestly...

Headed to the cinema after that to watch Legion - starring the guy from Da Vinci Code - Paul Bettany as the good angel, the guy from 2 Fast and 2 Furious and Transformers - Tyrese Gibson, the guy from The Fast and The Furious - Lucas Black, a cameo girl from Supernatural - Adriana Palicki, and some more. The film is a bit horror for me and evolved around Christianity, but still, like Da Vinci Code, I'm just enjoying the story...

After the movie, I went to Carrefour to buy some groceries and toiletries... There were a lot of people as the Chinese New Year is getting near... Got to see a lot of hot Chinese guys... :) Oopsie... Let's just scratch that...

Then, went to Starbucks to get Iced Caramel Macchiato. Nash was at the counter and I saw Mr. Blender is back after a long break... Both of them noticed I went shopping alone, and teased me if I was with someone. Like that ever gonna happen! :P

After reading a few pages of Eclipse, I decided to check on Padini, to see if there's sale and YES! There is! I went in and grab some T-shirts and shorts.

I called for a delivery and waited at Big Apple. Reached home around 8 p.m.

At home, Bella opened the door for me. She noticed the scooter and I noticed her car parked outside the fence... :D So, now everybody in the house has a ride! It's a good thing I guess... I chatted with Bella for a while before she went to get her friend from campus to accompany her in the room tonight.

All in all, wow... I think I should do this shopping-alone again... :) hehe

Good night!

Wondering, Wishing, Wanting, Willing, Waiting,...

Yesterday, I heard someone's said,

"As a human being, desire is a must. If you don't have one at least, you are just the same as the dead,"

Really? Seriously?

When I think about it, like really think about it deeply, over and over again, I realized it's been a very long time since I had something that I really want and willing to do anything to get it. Well, it doesn't include any unethical things. But still, if I'm not mistaken, the last thing that I want so badly - to the extent that I would be jumping around and dancing like I'm the luckiest person on earth, was... I can't remember.

I always go by the flow of time, going through things that happened and accepted them as if there's nothing I can do to make them stop from happening. Well, what's done is done...

Back to now, I think I need to be more sensitive and try to be more alert of things that happening, events on going, meeting new people, trying new things, and lots more...

I wonder... If I can be someone I want to be...

I wish... If I have more courage in me, I would want to take risks in order to get something extraordinary...

I want... The thing I want most in my life would benefit people around me...

I'm willing... To do anything I need to get it...

I'm waiting... for the time to come for me to start going for it...

Is it now? Is it later?

Is it now or never?

New Me... I Guess...

Happy New Year, everyone... It's 2010 and I've got few things to say...

As usual, new year comes along with fresh determinations... Therefore this year, I'm determined to shape myself and become a better person... Inside out...

I hope I can manage my time properly,

prioritize things around me = studying should comes to the 1st place,

and lots of things to be taken care of...

and most importantly to get to know more of what is the thing that I want most in my life...

"It can't be done" is I hate mostly... So, I will never do things halfway anymore... I want to finish every single thing I had started... But of course... Studying isn't something I can be done with but in things involving commitment and determination in achieving something, I would really want to try at least finish every phase I have to go through in order to go forward to the next phase, in my field of study, in my life...

That's all.

It's Raining, Again!

Since last week, it's been raining non-stop from morning till night here in Kuantan. Seriously, I'm not complaining but every time it's raining my mood will go down and down. Why? Even I don't know... This raining season is basically driving me crazy... Can't go anywhere, anytime, every single day...

I still remember back home, every time it's raining mum will fry something to eat like fried banana, 'cucur' or anything like it... and all of us will have some tea while seating in the living room. It's so warm and comfortable... I really like the feeling and I have to admit, I was less feeling crazy back then...

I think everything is nice about home...

It's freaking 9 in the morning and here I am, sitting in our WacKOS - a place for us as SCIENCESS students to hang out, online, read newspapers, well it's our Resource Centre actually but we call it as WacKOS.

Speaking of WacKOS, let me tell you about how WacKOS got its name.

Even since our Foundation days back in CFSIIUM, SCIENCESS students are known not only as less nerdy - and smart in terms of appearance than Medicine students and less stylo than Architecture students, but also we are fun and wacky. Therefore, when we put Wacky together with the abbreviation of our Faculty - here known as Kulliyyah, Kulliyyah of Science (KOS), we get WacKOS.

Well, at least that was I was told by my senior. (If I'm wrong, correct me.)

Hmm... Class is at 11 and I think I want to revise some more.

Have a nice day, people!

Floating In The Air

This is my 21st flight.

Hmm... My 21st flight is when I'm 21 years old. Cool.

I stopped the 'drama' in the airport on my 10th flight. But all of a sudden, there were tears in my eyes when I was looking back and saw mum waving at me. I know that I'm not coming back for a very long time after this. So I guess that's why.

Basically, living far from my family is something that I adapted quiet a long time ago. I think since 2 semesters before I finished my foundation. Therefore, I don't have the homesickness while being away from my family anymore. It's just that when the times get tough especially during examinations, the feeling of wanting to be home is very strong.

I always remember what Mum said to me that I need to be very focus in my study and do everything what's needed in order to be an exellent student. Do things as hard as I can and as smart as I can get. I have to give 110% commitment in pursuing what I want like I've got nothing to lose.

Hmm... Sometimes I wonder why mums can always say wonderful things that fill our heart with confidence. They always know how to make us feel like floating in the air. Light, free, and comfortable.

Throughout This Holiday

Seafood - checked.
Shopping - checked.
Went to Grandma's - checked.
'Cooking like chef' at home - checked.
Went for movies - checked.
Japanese Drama Marathon - checked.
Fighting with lil' brother - checked.
Quality time with mum - checked.
Dad's Multi-Purpose Assistant - checked.


I think I'm quite happy with the holiday this time... :)